On Birth Stories and Healing

I have been reading some birth stories that clients sent me. Often I assist in finding lost misplaced memories, filling in the blanks, as when giving birth, sometimes the mom’s timeline gets skewed. It’s interesting how some women remember their births.

I remember one of the first times a mama shared a birth story with me. It was a previous birth, one at which I was not present. It began beautifully: The sky had just opened after a raging thunderstorm, and as I looked out the window at the first ray of sunshine anyone had seen in a week, I felt that first surge of energy from my womb. Little did I know what lay before me, and that I would meet my daughter later that evening.

Quickly the story soured into a litany of sad comments about interventions that culminated into feelings of weakness and despair, the mom believing (as she had been told) that this was all to save the life of her unborn child, and then resolve that her body was not, indeed, capable of knowing how to birth a child without the capable hands of some expert at the helm, taking charge. (Later, as she read her hospital chart: failure to progress.)

At the end of the story, however, things changed and became happy again, because this mom had forgotten buried these feelings between the time of the birth and the writing of the story, and there was a thrill of having a beautiful and healthy baby and it was: her perfect birth.

Whaaa?

With the previous birth, she told me in our initial visit, she felt her doula did not help in ways that could have prevented these interventions. She had heard that I was strong and capable, and would advocate for her in the new hospital and help her husband know how to speak for her when she couldn’t speak for herself. And, didn’t I know something about hypnosis? And, did I think that the problems she had with her first birth could possibly happen again, or maybe even mar this birth?

That began a journey into her past that helped her reclaim her power, her inner strength and resolve to have this baby the way she wanted, when it was ready to come, in the position preferred to give birth.

There was lot of self-forgiveness in those hypnosis sessions. She felt she had to forgive herself her ignorance. She engaged in knowing her options. She changed her previous birth story to reflect her truth.

And in this birth she changed her organic memory, remembering her body’s knowledge of what she carried all along: she was made to have these babies in a normal, natural way, and she could do it. She would do it. Then came birth day, rainy, cloudy. ImageAs her baby emerged from her body, once again, the sky opened up and the sun shone. She took him to her chest and she cried for herself, for him, for her three year old daughter. She had reclaimed her human right as a woman.

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